Stop caring what others think of you and start living your life

We have to stop worrying about and putting so much energy in to other people’s opinions of us and outer life choices. Full disclosure: I struggle with this concept. My best friend, who is blunt with me at times – which I do need, told me yesterday as I got upset over a flippant remark someone made to me “you really need to let it go, you’re working yourself up over nothing!” These were words that, truthfully, I needed to hear. It got me thinking about all the times that I got upset over or wasted far too much of my energy caring about other people’s insignificant opinions of me or the way I live my life: “I’m too skinny and I don’t eat!” Or “I’m a posh bitch” because of my accent and the way I speak or even how I should be around my Husband and how I should be acting In my bloody marriage! Excuse me but kindly “f**k off and mind your own damn business!” My life is my life and I’ll live it how I see fit! And I’ve had zero complaints from my Husband by the way.

But not just things that have happened or been said to me but worrying about what people MIGHT think of me… people I don’t even know. When I go out and take outfit photos for my blog, I’m never fully relaxed doing it because I’m always worried about people walking past and thinking I’m weird or silently judging me (or vocalizing their judgement). Why?? I don’t know them and their opinion doesn’t matter because I’m not doing anything bad that negatively impacts anyone else.  Truth is that they probably have zero opinion of what I’m doing anyway and will forget I existed 5 seconds down the street. But I care anyway and for what? All this does is keep me from being happy and content and living my life to the fullest.

We spend so much of our time caring and worrying about other people’s opinions of us that we never truly allow ourselves to live freely and to our full potential. We don’t want to cause someone else any fuss and we hold ourselves hostage against other people’s expectations for us.  But here’s the thing, we only get one life. Just one. And nobody knows when they will die but we all will. If you knew that you were going to die in a week or a month would you care about other people’s opinions of your decisions in that time? Probably not.

Who is in control of your life and the decisions you make? You! When you let the opinions of others affect your decisions and the way you live your life then you’ve handed the control of your life and your happiness over your people who don’t care about your success and probably don’t have your best interests at heart (though they may pretend they do and they’re just giving you tough love.) You’ve just given away your power and your chance to become amazing and successful because those people who have negative opinions of you aren’t going to let you shine, they’re going to keep you down so that they can feel more important or successful than you. They don’t want you to succeed over them. Bullies are nasty to others that are generally leading happier lives than they are abd they are miserable with their lives. They don’t want to see you living the life they feel they are owed and so they resort to the most basic primal instinct of flinging shit at you like apes do, though in this case it’s hurling nasty, negative words at you to bring you down. So why should you care about their opinions of you if you know they don’t care about you?

Do yourself a favour and stop caring about the opinion of others and live the life you were given.

Have fun with this one life you’ve got.

Xoxo Ellie

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46 Comments

  1. April 5, 2017 / 2:28 pm

    Hey girl,

    I ABSOLUTELY 100% agree with you on this post, and this is EXACTLY how I feel! I kind of just wrote a piece on my blog like this, as well… so I’m SO happy that you wrote your take on this, too. Love it.

    Thanks for being so candid! I’d love it if you could check out my blog, too, and let me know what you think.

    Anyway, I’m super excited to see more posts from you. Keep it up, lady!

    Xx
    Margaret
    http://runwaywithrigney.com/

  2. April 5, 2017 / 6:27 pm

    Great post. Loved reading this! And I love these photos! They are so colorful!

    Nicole / theleopardcoat.com

  3. April 6, 2017 / 6:02 am

    I struggle with this too and totally feel the same way sometimes while doing photos. But you’re absolutely right they don’t care and you just have to focus on your own life. Thanks for your honesty.

    Cheers, J
    http://www.cheersj.com

  4. April 6, 2017 / 8:30 am

    Someone once told me “What others say about you says more about them.” A lot of mean comments are just people projecting their own insecurities. Once you realize that, “letting it go” becomes a lot easier!

  5. April 6, 2017 / 9:22 am

    I’ve learnt to live for my happiness without worrying about others opinion about me, but yes! I make sure I don’t hurt anyone in this evolution 🙂

  6. April 6, 2017 / 9:54 am

    I love that sweater by the way. And it’s true, I also think we forget that people are thinking the exact same thing and wondering if you’re judging them. How often do we actually look at people and judge them vs just wondering about them? I try to remind myself to always think of the positive before jumping to the negative opinion.

    I love love love the colors on these pictures! So pretty

  7. April 6, 2017 / 10:06 am

    100% agreement! Somehow people have it in their minds that they have been given the ultimate right and power to judge others. Imagine a world where we all supported each other and lifted people up instead of putting them down. The ultimate goal I guess, right? Keep being you and shine as bright as you possibly can!

  8. April 6, 2017 / 10:45 am

    I totally agree. We getting so wrapped up in the opinions and views of others that we begin to live for their approval. #societygirl

  9. April 6, 2017 / 11:36 am

    We all need a reminder of this. I just recently started blogging and had to come to grips with letting go some. It takes a leap away from that complete control to allow others in.

  10. April 6, 2017 / 1:09 pm

    I love this article! Yes, when we give up the NEED to care about what others think of us, we become free. We are free and we can then discover our own self-love and self-appreciation.

  11. April 6, 2017 / 1:12 pm

    LOve the look of these photos! Very unique! It’s a work in progress when it comes to letting go of what others think of you. Every year I keep getting better. 🙂 Progress, not perfection.

  12. April 6, 2017 / 1:25 pm

    This is so true and I often struggle with this concept myself. As I am getting older I am caring less about other peoples opinions and more of my own, it takes a brave person to not let others opinions matter. Great post

  13. margfit2016
    April 6, 2017 / 2:20 pm

    Yes!! This is so important! I think that it can honestly be dangerous to care a whole lot about what others think, because this is your life and you should live it how you want to! Thank you so much for sharing, this is so important!

  14. mrsportiasmith
    April 6, 2017 / 5:54 pm

    This is such great advice! I completely agree – it’s so important to hold onto your confidence and power. Really love your relatable posts! xoxo

  15. Southern & Style
    April 6, 2017 / 8:54 pm

    I have struggled my whole life with this, but the older I get-the better I seem to get about it! Thanks for such a great post (and beautiful photography!)

    xoxox, SS

    Southern And Style

  16. maplebee92
    April 6, 2017 / 9:53 pm

    I absolutely agree with you here! Living life without fearing what others think is so important. Love the photos too.

  17. mihabalancom
    April 7, 2017 / 1:47 am

    You are so right, I also get distracted when taking pictures in the streets by people stopping and looking but it’s not they know me or I know them..can I just say, love the colors you have in the pictures, amazing 🙂

    https://mihabalan.com

  18. LaToya C
    April 7, 2017 / 4:28 am

    I totally agree with you! Beautiful images also!

  19. April 7, 2017 / 8:28 am

    Such a revenant for today. I think we all have had this issue before and have had to come to the realization that we are in control. And that we have to let things go and not let what others think dictate us.

  20. April 7, 2017 / 8:33 am

    Great post and great message- I need to continue to work on this concept! Thanks for the reminder.

  21. April 7, 2017 / 10:38 am

    I wholeheartedly agree with you. In this age of social media and the tendency to post everything we all often face a lot of judgement from peers and even strangers. We all need to stand in our truth and live our best life!

  22. April 7, 2017 / 11:26 am

    These are words that we all need to hear. At the end of the day, our life is our life. And we should just do exactly what we want.

  23. April 7, 2017 / 6:34 pm

    I tell this to my teens all the time! I say good for you! You’re at a point in life that some people will never get to because they can’t let go of others opinions.

  24. Paige
    April 8, 2017 / 1:49 pm

    Great use of colour and lighting in this post, also completely agree!

  25. April 8, 2017 / 1:54 pm

    I love the night photography! I wrote a post awhile back on the same thing, so I completely agree with you!! People can think whatever they want!

    http://www.stylebymemory.com

  26. April 8, 2017 / 8:35 pm

    I couldn’t agree more with you that we must give importance to ourselves before giving to others. If we are not happy with ourselves, we can’t make our loved ones happy!

  27. April 9, 2017 / 3:29 pm

    Is it the truth though!? Your bestie is a wise one it sounds like, great advice! xoxo!

  28. Liz H
    April 10, 2017 / 10:04 am

    I love this post! It’s so hard not to care what people think sometimes, but you have to do what’s best for you!

    Liz
    http://Www.lizzieinlace.com

  29. April 10, 2017 / 12:44 pm

    Great post and I totally agree with you that we make our own life and decisions and we cannot take the precious time out of our lives to worry about pleasing those who will never be pleased. Thank you for sharing.

  30. The Blonde Diary
    April 10, 2017 / 12:49 pm

    Enjoyed reading this post! I totally agree with you. Remember to always stay true to yourself.

    xoxo,
    Gabi

  31. April 10, 2017 / 1:35 pm

    This is the kind of post that I needed to hear, as I always worry about what others think of me. But do you know what, your right. I should stop caring and life my life because as you said we are in control of our lives and not them! xx

  32. April 10, 2017 / 5:25 pm

    i agree. But sometimes it’s hard because we are humans. Amazing pictures by the way. So colorful.

  33. April 10, 2017 / 7:23 pm

    I love everything about this post! So agree with the content, it’s much healthier to stay in your lane and stop worrying about what others think, even though it’s tough at times. The photos are so incredible too, it’s like magical! Love it girlie!

    Chelsea
    Chow Down USA
    Instagram

  34. alisonrost
    April 10, 2017 / 7:41 pm

    Your words are so true. It’s so easy to get sucked into worrying about what others think .. especially in our world of constant social media. Whenever it happens to me .. I have to completely step away for a few days and re-find my center

  35. April 10, 2017 / 9:19 pm

    This is an inspiring post. Whenever I read something like this, I remember a meme I saw on Facebook years ago that said, “Why try to fit in when you were born to stand out?” That really hit home. Now, I just turn a blind eye and a deaf ear to people who try to dull my sunshine. I was not born to please them anyway.

  36. April 10, 2017 / 10:55 pm

    It’s so important to know when to let go. Nobody said it would be easy. Personally, I have been worrying for years about other people’s opinions until one glorious day when I realized that I stopped or, at least, I didn’t care that much. If it’s an opinion of those who love me and care about me, I will always take it on board. Also, I would pay attention to constructive comments which would help me improve. But, girl, if someone is talking for the sake of talking or trying to judge you just because, turn around, leave and let it go that very second.
    We aren’t in charge of what’s going to happen today or tomorrow but we have control over how we are going to react to it. You look so lovely, by the way. Love the venue for the photos <3
    xox Nadia
    http://www.mielandmint.com

  37. April 10, 2017 / 11:27 pm

    I love the post, this is so true. Start living your own life is more important than what others think of you. I love the photographs 🙂

  38. April 12, 2017 / 5:44 am

    It took me years until I realized I am missing so much if I care what other think of you. After that, I learnt to set my self free and I am so happy I did it. Starting a blog is the perfect example you are proud of who you are, you want to inspire people and set them free too ^_^ Kisses

  39. April 13, 2017 / 2:22 pm

    I think caring what others think hinders you from achieving your life goals.It’s a terrible thing. So much freeing without that chip on the shoulder.

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